mattie is a wily feline temptress with killer legs and 9376439 boyfriends - testimony from actual customer Katherine C.

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Cashier: That'll be $4.03
Me: I only have $4...
Cashier: That's ok, I have the three cents
Me: ...........
Cashier: ........
Me: what are we?


getintherobot:

tickatocka:

i want someone who’s never seen b99 to explain this screencap

image

is this live action cowboy bebop

(via captainscarletts)


jessica-messica:

ellewcee:

there’s no caption for there’s just me lying face down on the floor

Jesus Christ, Messina

(via pepperpeople)


wandsandblueboxes:

wulferine:

changing the date on your paper so your teacher doesn’t think you’re a procrastinator

An Essay,

(that I totally didn’t finish in the last ten seconds before it was due….)


parzival221:

shak1ra:

redevoted:

bowserfucker:

oknope:

imagine reading a book of all the lies you’ve told 

IDK what kind of lives you all are leading, but this sounds like the boringest shit. “Yes I sent that email.” “Yeah, I like your outfit.” “I was sick.” “My mom said no” “No I wasn’t crying.” “Yes I read the Terms of Service”

what about a book of all the lies people have told you

Oh how the tables have tabled

Tables have tabled

(via wandsandblueboxes)


caseyanthonyofficial:

Lets stop pretending that pants are even necessary its time we progress as a society

(via the-waffle-intrepid)



crayonster:

timeturner:

bex-chan:

you know you’re getting old when you watch the little mermaid and when ariel says “i’m 16 years old. i’m not a child anymore.” and you’re just sat there like yes you fucking are young lady stop it

The day you start agreeing with the parents in kids movies is the day it’s all over.

(via fighterprincess)


genocidercyo:

clockey:

you’re the window to my wall

you’re the sweat that drips down my balls

(via saintslucia)


Me most of the year: Want that. Want that. Want that.
Me near my birthday & Christmas: I CANNOT THINK OF A SINGLE THING I WANT.

times-like-these7:

sorelatable:

If your name is on one of these I just wanna let you know your parents are basic bitches with no creativity

image

Sounds like someone’s sad they couldn’t find their name on a coke bottle

(via wandsandblueboxes)


This is gonna sound so stupid but what is a fuckboy? lol
by Anonymous

rememberingsuunday:

fuckboy symptoms:

  • timothy over here askin’ for nudes when all u did was say hello
  • connor who won’t calm down with his axe spray tryna infect ya lungs
  • colin adding #420 to his bio when he smoked weed one time
  • gregory mad cause u didn’t blow him after the first date

how to spot a fuckboy:

  • white nike tube socks with his adidas sandals
  • he wants to play 20 questions (!!!!!!!!! do not play !!!!!!!!!!! especially if there’s a “;)” involved)
  • relies on his mom but doesn’t respect women
  • looks like he just read one of jaden smith’s tweets in all of his selfies
  • can’t find the clitoris

fuckboys come in all shapes and sizes and results may vary but when he a fuckboy…he a fuckboy…and u will know


the-pietriarchy:

clearly-on-drugs:

the-pietriarchy:

there are still school shooter fangirls on this website

image


do you really have to be this fucking ignorant?

image

image

(via captainscarletts)